i realized i can't write about myself in first person. i always turn to a third person- a he/she to write about. i only do it here because i know that some people read it. people that i know. it doesn't bother me as much as it used to- but maybe that's why i write 'she' instead of 'me/i' it's like the great schism. everything seems to be fine for a while- a long time. weeks go by without a single raised voice. and then just something stupid collapses it. i sometimes wish that the world was in the palm of my hands. i'd like to spin it and twirl it. right here, right now. maybe it's peer pressure when she says 'i don't know' when asked if she believes in god. friends can do crazy things to you like that sometimes.
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