you know how they always say that there is a truth drug out there. it seems to depend though. mine lately (or tonight) is nyquil. all i can repeat in my mind is that i'm not a heavy-weight, so it goes right to my head. maybe that's why last night i got so weird after eating that cake. cake suspected of being alcoholic. although i'm usually mellow after vodka (or anything with alcohol). now i can just do enough to close my eyes and see three white lights in the darkness. he said that once you close your eyes the world stops to exist. no. wait- that there no longer is anything. it's all debatable. my eyes are heavy, my head is heavy. it takes too much to even look at a screen. i just want someone to appear next to me so that i can lean against them and close my eyes. not worry about falling asleep here, right now. it's a big fantasy in my head.
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